It's amazing that I have so much on my mind and in my heart but whenever I sit at my computer, words are lost and my mind goes blank. Like right now. I think of so many things to write about when I'm in the shower, driving my car, going to bed, etc. So this is merely an excersize to get my fingers moving across the keyboard hoping that this movement will stimulate my brain to communicate.

I received my EMT paperwork this weekend so that I be able to take the national registry exam in a couple weeks.

This wilderness in my life is strange. I do feel that I am going through this "trial" yet through the forrest I walk on this path that will get me home. Maybe our lives are always in "the wilderness." There is no point in which we are truly home. We are nomads in a strange land. Our destinations are constantly changing with each day. And we are in constant pursuit to find what we must do. And I do mean "must." I'm not one to think that we are here on earth to buy a home, raise a family, get a good 401k, retirement fund, so that at sixty-five I can buy a mobile home to collect sea shells on the Gulf Coast. I do believe in purpose. In service. If I find myself at age 70, with most of my life devoted to working for some corporation, and earning money merely to get stuff, travel, and be comfortable, I will take my life for it would be a waste. This life I have is not mine. I can't claim it. I do not own nor would I ever want to. I am here to serve. To be a friend to the friendless, a brother to the brotherless, a father to the fatherless, and bring hope to the hopeless.

I can't imagine myself any different. It's not me.